4/4/17 / tuesday / some stuff on mind / final clothes gone

Blog status : complete

Had a good morning woke up to call in for spin.

Breakfast

Eggs and oats

 

Spin – Ann

Spin was a great class burned a lot of calories was asked about the myzone from a couple people in spin.  Looks like some people might be getting them.  Nicole from Manahawkin decided to get one.

Lunch

Chicken rice salsa

 

Pt- Session Dana

Today we worked on upper body felt great.  Actually on my work to tonight had someone that I haven’t seen in monthe said wow you lost all that weight and look at those arm.

Last bit of clothes to go

Well few months ago I got rid of most of my old clothes.  I held off on getting rid of my dress clothes because they are expensive.  I got rid of my suits dress shirtsn and pants.  Gave them away to someone that works at race track.  There is no going back now as I got rid if several thousand dollars worth of clothes.  That was actually very hard to do.

Whats on my mind

Well in the begining of this journey my fear was having excess skin and needing surgery.  I was told it couldn’t be guaranteed but good chance most skin should go back.  When Dana and I were talking today aboutbmy weightloss and I grabbed my stomach and said just need the rest of this to go away.  She kinda had the uh oh look in her face 😔.

She asked if I was sure if it was fat or is it left over skin?  I said im not sure, i spoke with katie asked her opinion showed her my stomach she well there is some fat there but some is skin.  Dont get my wrong im beyond happy about my weightloss.  Everyone has helped me murder the fat cells in my body.  I have dropped almost 1/2 of my entire body  weight of what I originally weighed total weight loss of 130lbs original weight over 360lbs.  Current weight 230lbs.  Katie told me look at everying you have gained.  She js right i have gained so much mentally and physically.  Katie mentioned some of the skin can be replaced by muscle gains in stomach.

Part of me is upset and pissed off at myself for letting myself get as big as I did for so long.

On the things I want to talk to Ann about is how I can build up my abs more.  I really dont want excess skin, it would be a constant reminder of how I used to be 😕 surgery wouldnt be an option for me as this type of surgery is consideted cosmetic and not covered by insurance and I dont have insurance as it is.  I will do my best to build my abs up but if I dont i will just have to deal with this.